I'm on my 2nd cup of tea this morning. Finally, a calm, relaxed morning. No work. Nowhere to be. Lots to do, but it can wait.
It's 28 degrees outside. Frost still sits on the grass. Olive snoozes at my feet. The smell of stargazer lilies fills the downstairs. The government shutdown has caused our American TV channels to be shut off, so all is quiet.
So now I sit down to write about our 2nd year of marriage, just a few days late.
Two years! Both of our anniversaries have been celebrated in Germany, a fact that continues to amaze me. The weirdness of living in another country still creeps in on me, yet at the same time, Germany is home now. Maybe not home in the way that Atlanta will always be TRUE home, but Germany is NEW home. It's where we've spent the majority of our marriage now. For this reason (and many more), Germany will always, always hold a dear, special place in my heart.
Our 2nd anniversary snuck up on me. I would be lying if I said it was extravagant or exciting. (Remember how we spent our first anniversary in Prague?) But the truth is, it was exactly what we wanted and needed it to be. A night at home, just the two of us, cooking dinner together, flowers on the table, small gifts exchanged. I couldn't be happier with the fact that I got to keep my comfy pants on and didn't have to venture out into the cold night air. It was comfortable. It was sweet. It was very much like our 2nd year of marriage...
I've shared some about how stressful and overwhelming and emotionally exhausting our first year of marriage was for me, simply because of the amount of change that took place in our lives. Our relationship was strong and steady and growing, but life was difficult. This 2nd year, there's been a decided shift, even if it's only really become apparent to me in the last few months.
Life finally "evened-out". We were finally able to settle, physically in our home in Germany, and for me, emotionally into my new roles in marriage, and work, and Army-life-overseas in general. Then we got pregnant and WHOA, hang on, who shook up my snow globe?! Knock it off.
That's another thought for another day.
We settled into our marriage, and in the best way. We've spent the last year traveling, welcoming visitors, working hard, taking a step back from work (for me), joining Bible studies, making friends and finding our niche here, together. And we LOVE doing life together. It's probably obnoxious, but I'm ok with that. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I would rather be doing nothing with Zach than anything else with anyone else. He continues to amaze and fascinate me, not just as my husband, but as a person, as a man. There's just so much to him...things that you really have to work at, to watch for, to patiently observe or engage in conversation over a long period of time to even start to discover about him. His mom has told me this since we first started dating, that he has many layers, and it couldn't be more true. I spend a lot of time wondering what goes on in his mind, not in the "why doesn't he open up and share with me?" sense (because he does that very well), but in the "I can't wait until he lets me see these latest thoughts, dreams, insights...". The thing about my husband is this: as you get to know him, you see so many positive qualities that make him a likable guy. As you get to know him MORE, you see how deep these truly go and realize how much more there is to him than what meets the eye.
I could spend a lot of time talking about these qualities...giving examples of his integrity and kindness and sense of humor and generosity and wisdom and strength, both in the workplace and at home. AND in his personal relationships. But as I sit here thinking about two years of marriage with him and the many, many years ahead (God willing), the thing that most excites and amazes and overwhelms me is that I get to be front and center, sharing his life, watching him grow, and discovering each new layer to him. Better yet, I get to play a crucial role in all of this. The daily gems, the little things he says and does, the way he loves me and cares for others...those are just bonuses.
That's been one of my favorite takeaways from year two of our marriage. We've settled, and in that settling we've become more comfortable in our roles as husband and wife...and I've seen there's even more to Zach than I knew...and it's a good more. An exciting more. A more that I can't wait to discover... here's to the next 60 years (or more!) of more.